September 2015

Alpha Bitch? Me?

Dear Friends, It’s a dark and stormy night in Baltimore, and a hint of winter permeates the air.  My mood is as sulky as the weather. I am annoyed that someone- today- a male uber driver gave me the facial expression of what would amount to being called a bitch. You ask me what did I do? I suggest it was more about what I didn’t do. I happen to

The Big O and Porno

Dear Friends, Tonight, I am writing about pornography and orgasms and oh what the hell penis size. I personalIy have not watched porn in years, but when I did, the women were super skinny  with enormous breasts. The men were buffed and had enormous penises. Those iconic images is one of the reasons our perceptions about sex are so jaded and discordant with reality. Its not only porn its in

Playing Ophelia.

Dear Friends, In Shakespeare’s play Hamlet, Ophelia his fiancé has sex with him before they are married. She does this because she was willing to do almost anything in order to marry Hamlet. Ophelia sleeps with Hamlet even though its against her personal and religious beliefs. Instead of winning Hamlet, she in facts loses him. He tells her to “get thee  to a nunnery.” Nunneries were where highborn women were

Are You Lonely Tonight? Alienation

Dear Friends, I have always felt that I didn’t fit in, didn’t belong.  I have always felt different and from my earliest recollections I was different. I was not born in America, I was multi-racial at a time when being multiracial was not common. I was also painfully shy and awkward. This is enough to doom anyone. Later, when I was nine my parents moved us to a school in

Sex Sex Sex Addict.

Dear Readers, I have dated a man who is a recovering  crack cocaine  addict, but an undisclosed sex addict. Don’t smirk yet. The idea of a man up and ready for sex may sound like a good thing, it is not. First let me define what constitutes a sexual addiction. The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Psychiatric Disorders, Volume Four describes sex addiction, under the category “Sexual Disorders Not Otherwise

Dreams, Have you Got Any you Want to Revive?

Dear Readers,  Where ever you are as you read this blog, jail, hospital, mansion in Beverly Hills, Baltimore basement apartment or Inner Harbor Ritz Carlton Home, this blog is about not giving up on yourself or your dreams. Others will always criticize your dreams. You will criticize your dreams. Both are fine as long as you don’t stop pursuing your dreams.  I know that dreams require action. Each day I

The Last Day.

Dear Readers, Today was the last day of summer. Grey clouds and cool temperatures marked the day of my Father’s funeral. I had a beautiful day today. I saw family that I had not seen in years. I was greeted and hugged by friends who came to show their love for me- all of them protectively close and guarding my heart. And the young people still hopeful and shy and

Where Have All the Boys Gone? 1out of 6

Dear Readers, 11 years ago when I was a lawyer for abused and neglected children, the statistics about abuse of young boys was resoundedly missing. This has always bothered me. I am also infuriated when people smirk when they hear of  a young boy being sexually abused by an older woman and  they say that the boy got “lucky.” Here are a few facts, many of which I have taken

This Makes No Sense.

Dear Readers, Current events have triggered past emotional traumas and my responses have me running back to therapy.Whenever I feel abandoned and betrayed I strike out.  Not physically, but verbally. The intensity of my anger combined with my verbal acquity is my version of slice and dice. People tell me to let it go. I wish I could “let it go.” I do not know how to do this. If

Summer Time Blues Dad and Depression.

Dear Readers, Tonight it is difficult to write. Tonight it is difficult not to write. I will write about my depression and the unexpressed rage that lies beneath it. Tonight I am very angry as my sisters and Mother and Aunt plan my Father’s funeral. I am not interested in good theatre- for the nieces and nephews to share their gifts of song and rapping. I have nothing against song